Wudolf the Wed Nose Waindeer

Another year of little bodies lengthening and getting skinnier, of new experiences, of challenges for the girls and us and another year of language development. Here are some of the most memorable of the girls’ utterances:

 

Lara: ‘Are you hot hot hottity hot?’

Rhea: ‘Are you strong by name and strong by nature daddy?’

Lara: ‘Yuck yuck yuckity yuck.’

Rhea: ‘Can you keep an eye on my baby? She’s only little.’

Lara: ‘Yum scrum!’

Rhea: (passing a farm in the car) ‘A farm needs a farmer but there are never any farmers on the farms. Maybe they only come in the mornings?’

Lara: (at the modern dance performance) ‘Who made this [up]? Who thought this was a good idea?’

 

Rhea: ‘Santa didn’t come.’

Lara: ‘No Santa didn’t come because you asked for too many things and he’s still looking for all of them.’

 

Rhea: ‘2 and 2 is 4.’

Lara: ‘Did you hear what I said? If I say something to you, you need to say something back.’

Rhea: (to Steve): ‘Why did you say ‘God I love you?’

Lara: ‘I made a new fwiend today but I don’t know its name.’

Me: ‘Was it fun doing a wee in your nappy and not having to go to the toilet?’ Rhea: ‘No because it was smelly.’

 

Lara: ‘I don’t eat spaghetti with my hands like Weuben, I just use my hand to flatten it.’

Rhea: ‘I think we should give Weuben a book about eating spaghetti’ (for his birthday).

 

Lara: (After seeing photos of themselves as babies just after being born): ‘I was born first because that’s me.’

Rhea: ‘That was good timing. We got in the car just before it started raining.’

 

Lara: ‘I know who in our family will die first. It will be daddy, because he’s the biggest. Then there will be 3 girls left.’

Rhea: ‘Mummy and Maggie will die at the same time.’ Steve: ‘Why?’

Lara: ‘Because they are the same age.’

 

Rhea: ‘What does ‘zune’ mean in Fwench?’ (I asked the context). ‘Dans une [dans zune] minute.’

Lara: ‘Why are top teeth bigger than bottom teeth?’

Rhea: ‘Does [on] ‘purpose’ mean you don’t have to say sorry?’

Lara: ‘Do you know why I’m reading this (a glossy sales catalogue)? It’s all about clothes and it’s very interesting. I love it. There are people too.’

Rhea: ‘I love you mummy when you come home late and I miss you and I can cuddle you.’

 

Lara: ‘That family has 3 children. That’s a lot of work.’ Me: ‘Yes but they have 2 parents.’

Lara: ‘Yes. It would be easier with 3 parents. The mother must look after the baby.’

Me: ‘Or the baby might go to childcare.’

Lara: ‘That wouldn’t work. Childcare is for children [not babies.]

 

Rhea: ‘Lawa stop whinging and moaning!’

Lara: ‘You have 4 names: Mum, mamma, mummy and Isolde. . . and daddy does too.’

 

Me: (at the Folk Festival): That’s a violin.’

Rhea: ‘I know that. Daddy Pig plays the violin.’

 

Lara: (to Rhea) ‘Have you done a wee in the bath?’

Rhea: ‘No.’

Lara: ‘Oh good. Then I can drink the water.’

 

Rhea: ‘I’m power-wheeling around.’

Lara: ‘I have a few black friends. Solaha and Zara. Zara is like Lara and Tara.’

Rhea: (cooking) ‘It’s yummy when you taste it and it’s not cooked. Really yummy. I can’t stop tasting it!’

Lara: ‘How does the Easter bunny get all the way here from Anglesea? I think he gets a ride on Santa’s sled.’

Rhea: I didn’t see a single car.’

Lara: ‘Daddy said ‘fuck.’ Sometimes he says ‘shit.’

Rhea: ‘I should’vn brunged my scooter.

Lara: ‘I’m all scribbly scrabbly when I use my other hand [for writing, i.e. her right hand].

 

Rhea: ‘Lara won’t give me some of her ice-cream.’

Lara: I already gave you some!’

Rhea: ‘But I forgot what it tasted like!’

 

Lara: (waking up) ‘Mum, sometimes my feet feel all sparkly.’

 

Lara: ‘I love Jonah, do you Rhea?’

Rhea: ‘No. He’s a boy.’

 

Lara: ‘If I’d have been born a boy you would have said ‘goodnight darling boy.’

Rhea: ‘When Santa comes down the chimney we should ask him why he doesn’t use the door.’

 

Lara: ‘Did you like being little?’ Me: ‘Yes. Do you?’

Lara: Sometimes it’s a bit boring.’

 

Rhea: ‘Lawa is complaining.’

Lara: ‘Guess who I missed today?’ I guessed Heidi, Maggie, mum and Lara. ‘No it isn’t someone in Canberra. It’s someone here. It’s you.’

 

Rhea: ‘That’s disgusting!’

Lara: ‘Luckily. . . ‘

Rhea: ‘It’s not even fair!’

Lara: ‘That’s complicated!’

Rhea: ‘That’s impossible!’

Lara: ‘Tee hee!’

Rhea: ‘Tee hee!’

Lara: ‘A few whiles ago. . . ‘

Rhea: ‘Do you-oo. . . ‘

Lara: ‘We tooken it.’

Rhea: ‘Why. . . ? Why?’

Lara: ‘Why. . . ?’

 

Rhea: ‘Mum, why can’t we have a baby?’ I explained that they’re a lot of work and we don’t really have room. ‘Oh OK then.’

Lara: (after I had explained how Norman had delivered Steve) ‘Mum, when daddy was a baby did he wear glasses?’

Rhea: ‘I don’t want to have a chocolate muffin at preschool. It will get all over my face.’

Lara: ‘Are the sun and moon the same?’

Rhea: ‘I’m too snug to get out of my towel’ (to get undressed).

 

Me: ‘What’s daddy doing?’

Lara: ‘He’s making a cake but he keeps saying ‘fuck’ and stamping his foot.’

 

Rhea: (to Lara) ‘If you won’t be my best fwiend I’ll throw this block at you.’

 

Lara: Didn’t think that Louis could make a machine that could bring back someone who had died. Me: ‘Why?’

Lara: ‘Because Nigel was sprinkled. Maybe if he had just died but not when they have been sprinkled.’

 

Rhea: ‘She’s pissed that. . . ‘

Lara: ‘I love you very very very much.’

Rhea: ‘I love you as old as Nigel was.’

Lara: ‘Grandpa pwessed the windscreen wipers instead of the ’ticker [indicator] and he said ‘fuck’ and I laughed so much that water came out of my eyes.’

Rhea: ‘Heidi takes the short cut and mummy takes the long cut.’

Lara: ‘Daddy isn’t Rhea’s slave is he?’

Rhea: ‘I had some chocolate [cocoa] and it was so yucky I had to take a cup and drink water and spit it out and keep doing that until it was all gone.’

Lara: ‘I need 14 biscuits for my dolls.’

Rhea: ‘Wee is like ‘Weeah.’

Lara: ‘Wee-ee!’ [Rhe-ee!]

Rhea: ‘That tree [a pine] has a big tummy. It must be a daddy tree.’

Lara: ‘My lovely beautiful mother.’

 

Rhea: ‘I love daddy and Lara all the way to Maggie’s house and back.’

Lara: ‘I love you as big as a cloud.’

Rhea: ‘That’s not as much as I love you.’

Lara: ‘I love you as big as a ginormous cloud with lots of little clouds.’

 

Rhea’s blocks fell down. ‘Doesn’t matter I can build it again.’

Lara: (in the hospital for Rhea) ‘I’ll give Rhea 2 salty biscuits because I love her so much.’

 

Rhea: ‘I feel like some fresh air.’ Me: ‘Where?’

Rhea: ‘Around here ‘ (waves her arms inside).

 

Lara: ‘That [sign] says no mans in there. I think they mean no ladies either.’

Rhea: ‘Can you get some eggs so you can grow a baby in your tummy because I really want to have a baby.’

Lara: ‘This [helmut] is strangling my neck.’

Rhea: ‘Who decided to call a bush a bush? When?’

Lara: ‘How did the first person get born?’

Rhea: (watching the spill motion on TV) ‘Did he say Mr Rabbit or Mr Abbott?’

Lara: (driving past) ‘That’s Bunnings! That’s actually Bunnings!’

Rhea: ‘Who decided to call a cloud a cloud or the sun the sun?’

Lara: (Looking for 4-leaf clovers): ‘Here’s one. It’s massive!’

Rhea: ‘Why can’t Alice stay with us always? I love her so much.’

Lara: ‘You destroyed my lego!’

Rhea: ‘Why is a doggie not strapped in when it goes in the car?’

Lara: ‘Why do you have such a big tummy daddy? Is there a baby in there?’

Rhea: ‘Heidi has bought some air [hair] conditioner.’

Lara: ‘We put it elsewhere.’

Rhea: (after hearing mention of the Blue Mountains on the radio): ‘Is there really a Blue Mountain? Can we go there?’

Lara: ‘Wee-ah stop whinging and moaning!’

 

Lara: I know why the birds were up early this morning, so that they could see Santa and tell him what they wanted for Christmas.’ Me: ‘What do you think they’d want?’ ‘I don’t know. Birds say cheep cheep and no-one understands what they are saying.’

 

Rhea: ‘Santa said he was waiting for his wife.’ Me: ‘What’s a wife?’ ‘It’s a horse.’

Lara: ‘It’s not a horse. How can a horse be married?’

 

At the Science Week show, after the science host asked the children what animal might you have at home. A little boy called out ‘a fox!.’ The host said he’d give them a clue: it’s something that gives you food. Rhea: ‘A cow!.’

Lara: ‘Why doesn’t Santa’s wife come with him to deliver the presents? I wish Santa was a girl instead of a boy.’

Rhea: ‘Lara and I have different voices.’ Me ‘yes because you’re different people.’ ‘Lara and I are identical but you and Maggie aren’t identical because you look different.’

Lara: ‘Wee-ah, adults think that what children say is funny.’

 

On that note, we wish you much laughter in 2016.

 

 

 

 

 

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About Isolde

After extensive travel for short periods both inside Australia and overseas, I took a break from my health policy job to travel for two months in Spain, Portugal and Morocco and live for four months in France, three of those in Paris. I'm currently living back in Australia with Steve and our twins Rhea and Lara.