Lara seems to call it ‘ice’ – I don’t know why – and Rhea doesn’t call it anything in particular. But they both understand ‘time for milk!’ and come running. Approaching the age of two, breastfeeding is a routine part of their lives.
Breastfeeding has been a slow process of adjusting to the girls’ rhythms as they learnt how to do it then dropped from six feeds every 24 hours (plus one expressed feed administered by Steve) to currently two. I am contemplating dropping down to one feed a day. The prospect prompts me to reflect on how our feeds have changed over almost two years.
The early ones in hospital were tentative from my side and short and exhausting from theirs as they developed the stamina to take what they needed for their tiny bodies. After a week or so when we had all mastered the technique of feeding individually, the midwives suggested that I introduce my double breastfeeding pillow – bought second-hand from all classifieds and always used with a towel over the top for spills and dribble, the pillow was one of the best $20 I have ever spent. It’s basically a cloth-covered foam cushion in a reverse U shape, flat on top and strapped on by a clip behind my back. It even comes with a cushion inserted in the cavity of the U that I used to put behind my back: I usually fed the girls sitting on the floor at night time and the insert was very handy and comfortable. I would lie the girls on a folded old-style cloth nappy one on each side on the floor, set myself up then lift them on so their legs stretched down the sides of the U shape.
It was only a few months ago that the girls outgrew the breastfeeding pillow – their legs would kick against the wall and combined with a bit of fidgeting, it was harder to keep us all together. The pillow became a toy to be jumped on and the clip something to be clipped and unclipped endlessly so I started feeding them with all of us lying down in bed, putting them on a pillow one on each side of me while I propped myself up on a few other pillows. This has worked fine. The morning feeds are cosy and quiet and delay those toddler early starts as the girls feed intermittently (especially Rhea) while dozing the rest of the time for a while. The evening feeds are even more episodic: Lara is the more intermittent one in the evenings and she drinks much less, but they both jump up and down like yo-yos as they explore anything that’s going. Most recently, I’ve taken to reading a magazine while feeding them at night and that is always most fascinating. (Rhea passed me the magazine in anticipation while I was settling myself in a few days ago – helpful little soul).
You might think by their habits that the girls are just breastfeeding for the comfort and routine of it, but when one of them was sick and refused a feed around six months ago, I was surprised at how ‘full’ and uncomfortable I became, and how desperate to empty the tank at the next feed. If demand promotes supply then I see no reason why the supply would have dropped since then.
This phase of toddler breastfeeding is quite a fun one: they like to play games with me tickling them or they interact with each other. Last week Lara placed her hand gently on Rhea’s cheek and left it there for some moments. Breastfeeding still gives us quiet, cuddly time together in which I can rest too. Luckily they understand when I ask them to be gentle and not bite.
Breastfeeding in Western societies has been out of favour until relatively recently, and even though this is changing, many westerners would be surprised that because of their well-demonstrated benefits to brain development and both long and short-term health (as well as a range of benefits for mothers), the Australian Breastfeeding Association and the World Health Organisation recommend breastfeeding for ‘two years and beyond.’
So how long will I continue with it?
It’s not my decision. It will be matter of discussion between all of us: Steve, Rhea, Lara and I.
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